Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Why I'm happy women love cheese...

People tell you all the time that you don't need a lot of money to throw a great wedding. My dad loves to tell me that it brings out my creative side. "You go to so many weddings where they spend all this money and they all come out the same.  You'll figure it out," he says. By the way "you'll figure it out," is not what I want to hear.  What I want to hear is, "I just discovered this high-yield savings account I forgot all about. Hows about 40 grand?"

Anyway, I heard it so much I almost started to believe that there was some truth in it. That the more lavish the wedding the more it sucked out the intimacy and individuality of the event.  That is until I went to a gazillion dollar wedding at the Waldorf Astoria and promptly realized that the only reason people were telling me this was because I didn't have a choice.

Never before have I seen a more amazing chuppah. It was as if the flower covered trees were bowing to each other in reverence. The string ensemble that accompanied the 20 minute processional had me blowing my nose inside my program. The dress, the veil that went on for days. The collared, 3/4 sleeve shrug that was exactly what I had been looking for all year, made the bride look that perfect blend of beautiful, graceful and nervous. Walking into the reception all I could see were 4 ft. topiarys to rival a terra cotta army and 100 ft ceilings. There was a 12 piece band...The last time I saw that many people on stage was watching MC Hammer videos and trying to do the "2 legit 2 quit" hand signals. And the couple, so in love, eyes catching each other as they were pulled by different friends and relatives in all different directions. There was no denying it. This was not only the grandest wedding I had ever been too, it was also so filled with love in every tiny, possible detail.

Moral of the story, kids? NEVER go to a wedding at the Waldorf Astoria while planning your own. You'll only realize that money really can buy you the wedding of your dreams. But I know what people will say, they'll say, "But everyone has a sushi bar, you're going to have chicken quesadillas! Who doesn't love a quesadilla?!" And that's where I gotta admit that they might be right because the only thing my friends love more than me is cheese, thick...melty...delicious cheese. This might be the only wedding where some guacamole trumps the Waldorf.

1 comment:

  1. I love cheese and fried chicken more than just about anything in the world! I tried to break up with cheese once... it only lasted a couple of days... Fuck the Waldorf.